friends

It´s sad to not have anyone in the whole world.
I do have friends. They love and accept me and I trust them entirely. I love and accept them and I hope they trust me, too.
They take me to a pure and joyous place. from before everything crumbled. Maybe there is hope if there is trust.
I just love my friends very much, and I do miss them a lot.
I see them every ten years or so. Which is not fair to anyone.
With my family. My mom said that my sister would be glad if I returned to live close to them. What is more important than making my family happy? I am such a fool. I just need to decide to be happy. It´s just something so overwhelming for me.
I just want to be held and told that everything will be ok.
I got that once from an E.M.T.
I get that from my friends and my family, and it's so rare these days.
It's just so unfair to everyone to be so isolated.
I know now where my priorities are. I don't want to wait until I'm old and full of regrets. What good would that do anyone.
Doesn't the Lord Buddha say that we should take care of the living? I get it. It's not only about starving the ghosts, I also have to take care of the living .. darn, totally forgot about that.
I know I can be happier and I know that being closer to my friends and family is something I truely miss and deeply need. It took losing a few things to see what´s really important, what can be replaced and what can not. I have been such a fool, all alone and isolated and depressed for so long...